Here we are...at 41 weeks, 4 days! And STILL no baby! But we are nearing the end. By Wednesday, we have to have a baby. She just hasn't decided if she will come on her own or be forced.
I switched OBs at 39 weeks pregnant. It started out quite by accident. At my 39 week appt on Wednesday (2/21), I was still not "progressing" at all and my doctor mentioned AGAIN that we should talk about repeat c-section. I was not on board and told him so. He told me that we could plan for a VBAC, but that if I had no progress by the following Monday, we would need to "talk."
He walked out of the room and up to the receptionist and schedules my c/s for that Tuesday. Um, WHAT? This is my daughter's birthday and I get ZERO say in it? Besides which, I would only be a little over 40 weeks and I wanted to give my body a chance to actually do something. I was so upset that I left the office without scheduling my next appointment.
Later that day, I got a call from the nurse telling me that the doctor wanted me to go for an ultrasound to check on Bobo's size. This infuriated me because I had told him multiple times during my pregnancy that I was not interested in using ultrasound as a way to judge the size of the baby because of it being so highly inaccurate with Eva. In addition to this, the ultrasound is at a "high risk" office, so it cost us over $200 to have. I told the nurse this and that I would not be going for an ultrasound. The doctor called me and I didn't answer the phone because I was upset and needed some time to cool down. He left a voice mail telling me that I had to do it or I could not go foward with plans for a VBAC because he wanted to check on the baby's size. The nurse called back about 20 minutes later to schedule the ultrasound and again, I told her that I was not going for an ultrasound. The doctor called again and left a voicemail telling me that I really needed to go for an ultrasound. At this point, I had decided just to wait it out. I was not going in for that c-section, and the only way I knew around that was just not showing up at the hospital until I was in actual labor (which I really didn't want to do!) I tried calling him back that evening, but it kept going to voicemail, so I decided to sleep on it. I cried a lot that night and Stephen kept telling me that if I really wanted to go ahead with the VBAC that he would support me 100%. But that he felt like I needed to let the doctor know either way. I was up for 3 hours in the middle of the night praying about what to do.
So I called the doctor's office the next morning and made an appointment for that morning, dropped Eva off at Grandma's and headed to the appointment. I was really nervous and all ready to fight. The nurse asked me to undress from the waist down, but I decided not to. Nothing about trying to argue your case when you are not fully clothed! :) The doctor walks in and before I could say anything tells me that he has found an option that he believes will work the best for both of us. He had gone to a convention the night before and ran into a friend who agreed to take me on as a VBAC patient at 39 weeks and let me go all the way to 42 weeks! He did let me know that there was no hard feelings, but that he just wasn't comfortable with continuing care with a "high risk" patient. (Apparently wanting to try to have a baby normally is "high risk")
I headed over to the doctor's office that same day to meet the new doctor and as soon as I walked into the office, I knew it was the right place for me. I met with the doctor and we clicked right away. He is a lot younger than my previous OB, but has a completely different approach. He claims to be like a "male midwife". So far, we are on track to go all the way to 42 weeks (which was my decision) which is April 4th. So whether by brute force or otherwise, we will have a baby in the next 4 days! And unless Bobo gets a move on it in the next hour, she is not going to share a birthday month with Eva! :)
Since I am "post dates", I do have to have a BPP (biophysical profile) every appointment which basically is a quick ultrasound to check fluids and make sure that Bobo is practicing breathing, heart/lungs are working well, etc. So far, she has passed all 3 with flying colors! :)
I'm really glad I've gotten another 2 weeks to spend with my precious baby girl inside me. She isn't ready to come out and that's okay. She'll be 2 weeks stronger and 2 weeks more ready to face this big scary world and her big scary sister (who has started talking about her like she is already here :))
And even if I end up with another c-section, I feel like a stronger person for fighting for is best for my family and my baby. I feel like a stronger woman because I have fought for something that I believe in, even if my baby and/or body is not completely cooperative. A friend sent this to the other day and it really sums up what I believe about this pregnancy and the upcoming birth.
"Keep on trusting God for your delivery and your body to do what it knows to do. I know it's hard to wait and wonder what's going on with your body. Hang in there. Wait it out as long as you can....No regrets, right?
That said, I am scheduled for an induction on tomorrow night. I am still trusting God for a natural labor and delivery. If it doesn't happen (and it honestly looks like it won't), I'll keep trusting God anyway- disappointed and all. At least I'll be able to say that I waited for my baby as long as I could. I'll look back with no regrets.
Just so you and someone else reading this would know, this week I have been an emotional mess. I have been crying and extremely bitc**y. I finally got to a place where I had to realize that no matter what happens, at the end of this process I will have a healthy, bouncing, baby boy. That's my prize and not the type of labor and delivery. I hope what I am writing helps you. So keep believing for the VBAC you want. Keep trusting God until the very end. Just don't take your eyes off the prize: your new baby"
41 weeks (she has DROPPED!)
Tomorrow we have plans to clean out my car, install the car seat, and generally get ready for Bobo to get here. She'll be here soon!!